Well, here I am. I've been back in the states for about a week now. Tonight I have been snowed (or rather 'iced') in since about 6 pm and it just keeps coming down! I took a look at my bedroom when I got back and kept thinking how much it could use a good cleaning so tonight is the perfect night for that!
I started with my closet. First sorting out the clothes I do and don't wear and then out of the ones I do, the ones I should not! ha. This is typically a good feeling for me. Once I get everything all cleared out and organized I always feel much better. Tonight has been different. Tonight I look at piles of clothing and feel physically sick.
You see less than HALF of the amount of clothes I want to keep take up an overflowing 3 large laundry baskets. It would be a safe guess to say all of my clothes could easily take up 10+ baskets. I am not kidding when I tell you, I had no idea I owned this amount of stuff. I had things so tightly packed in my closet it was ridiculous.
It's a very typical thought, when I talk about Honduras people always say something to the affect of "We have so much here in America". It's a thought I've had many times, especially while I'm in or right after I get back from Honduras. That's really all it's been for me though, a thought.
Tonight, I look at my 3 overflowing laundry baskets and I see a small one room house with a family's combined amount of clothing equaling less than that.
How I long to be there. Thinking that I will be giving away the other half of my clothing there just seems so insignificant right now.
After my short month of serving in Honduras, I think I have just grown acustom to a more simple life. I'm overwhelmed by all the things I see in my room. In Honduras I had only what I could fit into my carry-on sized bags. (Which for me, is more than most but still!) When I woke up and got dressed my main thought was not of how I looked it was how I could serve Jesus more that day. Why is that so much more diffcult here? He is the same God no matter what country I am in but my life has so many more distractions around here. I have never thought of clothing as a distraction until now. I never realized how worrying about how I look in a certian outfit here differs from how God wants me to spend my life. Don't get me wrong. I am not saying that I feel everyone needs to give up they're cute clothing and dress like slobs all the time in order to please Jesus. Trust me, I have kept my fair share of nice clothing tonight and I plan on wearing it all still. I am just saying, to stop worrying. If we could stop over thinking how people will view us, if a shirt makes us look too fat, if a pair of pants don't fit just so, if your hair doesn't lay just the right way... then maybe we could see each other how God sees us. How God created us, beautiful, just like Him.
